My Funky Valentine
by Jordan Santana
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Digital Album
Immediate download to ensure your valentine has funk.Buy Now $10 USD
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Heavy feat. NFR
03:26
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Let Me Breathe
03:33
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Eskimo Lady
03:37
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Selina
05:47
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You're the Boss
02:55
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I Don't Need You
03:45
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16 Bars of Honesty
01:33
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Close to Me
03:46
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Dance Darling
03:34
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credits
released 14 February 2009
Produced entirely by Jordan Coleman.
All songs written by Jordan Coleman except "Heavy" written by Jordan Coleman and Natasha Rodriguez.
All songs recorded, mixed and mastered by Jordan Coleman.
Artwork by staci R harrell.
Produced entirely by Jordan Coleman.
All songs written by Jordan Coleman except "Heavy" written by Jordan Coleman and Natasha Rodriguez.
All songs recorded, mixed and mastered by Jordan Coleman.
Artwork by staci R harrell.
tags
license
all rights reserved
feeds
feeds for discography
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Oct 2011 -
Jan 2011 -
May 2010 -
Sep 2009 -
Feb 2009 -
Oct 2008 -
Aug 2008
contact / help
For help with downloads, click here.
For all other inquiries, click here.
Redeem download codes here.
- Track Name: Exploring feat. staci R harrell
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I bring the funk like the Isleys/music for supersizing
and homegirl your eyes be pretty like Mandy Knisley
I can be the maestro you can be the muse
wait and see just how this mic glow when I’m speakin tunes
freakin loose, hey can you dig it/out of all the fools I’m the biggest
which is why I’m the one to whom you should give your digits
I’ve been with it since ’86, heart broken by ‘95
I was “808s and Heartbreak” before Kanye was fly
they was lying to themselves, talking up their own egos
you look like a First Lady with the power to veto
the human heart is above all things deceitful
hey Black Magic Woman, I’m wondering if you’re evil
Pre-Hook:
I ain’t no Casanova, your player in tights
No no, I’m not ya Big Poppa, Notorious for my ice
Girl, I ain’t no Frank Sinatra, make all of ‘em swoon
I’m just Jordan Santana, Love is my Temple of Doom
Hook:
Let’s go, baby/make it happen, man
Let’s go, baby/cuz I ain’t waiting for you
Let’s go, baby/make it happen, man
Let’s go, baby/cuz I ain’t waiting for you
it’s alright, it’s all good
it’s alright, it’s all good
I bring the bass like a roadie/booming boxes like Sony
you look unreal, I could almost call you phony
but then I’d eliminate the chance that you’d telephone me
cuz you know I’ll answer you even if I’m in roaming
zoning out from Earth, is the mother ship your madre
extra-terrestrial vision, baby, you are not plain
stop saying that it won’t happen, I be the Captain
of your getaway shuttle, my Camry is happening
clapping a ha ha, you ain’t a thespian or actress
still I’m excited your performance was such a classic
magic, I can’t imagine you with them dudes there
cuz you deserve better, baby, I’m speaking too fair
so who cares if everyone else is scolding ya
I’d kinda really enjoy being the one holding ya
so in love, or maybe in like, or in attraction
but I’m telling you you you don’t really wanna miss the passion
Pre-Hook
Hook
Pre-Hook
let’s go exploring - Track Name: Heavy feat. NFR
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and the beat goes on and on and on
and the hearts burn on and on and on
and the pain hurts on and on and on
and the beat goes on
I had a lopsided patience
looking for someone to balance out the equation
chasin’ every little new sensation
thought I found the one, I could finally stop waitin
she was beautiful, and horribly complacent
wondered if she cared as much, didn’t wanna face it
I wanted fire, whether or not the sparks made sense
thought she could maneuver into my heart station
she scraped the walls on entrance with a vengeance
sent emotions screaming, rendering me defenseless
I said I liked the way it felt, and I meant this
but deep down I was crying out to end it
Hook:
they never said Love would feel like this, so heavy
and I don’t know where to go from here
they never said Love would make my heart unsteady
and now I feel each and every tear, so heavy to me
years later, I was over second guessing
muttering curses, searching for a blessing
I felt like Conduct, melancholy complecting
my heart never resting, just depressing
then I found her, somewhere in the southwest wing
of America, she was strong enough to test me
I thought I’d never live if she ever left me
funny how the best thing soon becomes the next thing
I pressed too hard, I waited too long
I was too fragile, maybe I was too strong
I acted too right, I acted too wrong
but basically I screwed it up, it’s a true song
Hook
holding tight for my life and I might fly or fall down
never knew Love could be what would break the string
kinda torn in the storm and it pours sadness all down
tie the anchor around, throw me out to sea
Hook - Track Name: Let Me Breathe
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you used to be proud of your man, now you keep it a secret
leave it alone in public cuz it’s mighty convenient
see, it’s pretty primitive, living it like a faker
it’s give and take but you’re such a better taker
blamer, you’ve been calling me the fool
in a fire of your desires while you’re living it cool
you rule my heart, cuz baby, beauty is my master
it’s beating faster, it’s beating faster
ghetto blaster, how we fight in the car
I got a headache on the brink, it’s sitting right where you are
I punch the steering wheel hard and there might be a scar
and all we’ve ever really needed is a light in the dark
to see the flaws in the situation, and ourselves
we’re still making no sense, still living in shells
still making out under pictures of someone else
and he’s looking down at me, I think we both need help
Pre-hook:
what a wicked word we live in
I gotta leave it all behind
what a twisted heart you’ve given
I gotta leave it all behind
Hook:
ugh, let me breathe
homegirl, just let me be
this love is a joke and nothing but choking me
so let me breathe
you used to enjoy your man, now you don’t even notice
you’re so unattached you could be in showbiz
I never really want to be your only focus
but a little affection, can you not condone this?
my throat is filling up with ugly topics
I’d love to talk about it but you’ll wanna drop it
“rock it, don’t stop” is an old conviction
and now we sit and let the fire die, so listen
I wonder if we’ll ever change/we’d never gain
a moment of peace tryna make a home as complete
as all the anger we create, how we roam with the beast
and let him eat away at us, can we own it at least
and take the blame, but baby, I can’t take the pain
we’re different species, we probably wouldn’t mate the same
I hate the game, you play it like you made it up
or you’re immune to the effects of fading love
Pre-Hook
Hook - Track Name: Eskimo Lady
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Hook:
Eskimo lady, I hope we never part
Cuz you’re the only one, who can stand my cold heart
you be that new school pretty/a beautiful face
but with and old school class and a heavenly grace
I got a frostbite heart like Alaskan ice
and I expect the situation’s gon’ last for life
you like that cold night air, and I like your style
plus your personality, cuz it’s bright and wild
and if you like my heart, chances are, you won’t break it
cuz them other girls can’t take it
oh, I think she likes me, ain’t even talking ‘bout more
she likes me, I’ve never had that before
she’s not bored with me/she treats me like a charming friend
she even thinks that I’m fly like a ptarmigan
I’ve never felt so good, I’m speaking honestly
my heart’s erupting, you can call it Mount Augustine
she got me, ima act blunt here:
her eyes are like America’s Last Frontier
Hook
I want a house made of ice, whatcha call that?
an Igloo? Well, homegirl, I want all that
I’m sure six months of night isn’t all bad
it’ll probably comfort me when I’m all sad
and if I fall on the ice, I won’t fall mad
but if I do, I’ll just pray you don’t recall that
I’m cool to chill, I ain’t never been a mallrat
uhhhh…yeah
oh, I think she likes me, I think it’s better than love
she really likes me, even when the pressure is up
and she don’t wanna be with anyone else, she’s so astounding, dude
she says them other boys are dogs like a malamute
I’ll keep digging her, even if she lets me stop
and she’ll keep liking me, she will forget-me-not
she’s so sweet, I really wish I always knew her
me and my girl are going North to the Future - Track Name: Be My Queen feat. Evan Fernald
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everybody need a whole lotta woman/never really want a little girl
not a lady with a pride that’s swollen/just comfortable in her own world
ima say no to that open enrollment/I wanna fight for something rare
men really want a heart that’s golden/most chicks got nothing there
but then where can I find a prospect/well I got a lady on my mind
you haven’t morphed into a boss yet/but you ain’t afraid of the daily grind
you got a way of putting me in a coma/now if only I can make you swoon
it’s a wonderful life, young woman/get a lasso, I can take the moon
I could see us with a fence and a couple of trees
I could see us skipping rent, running from the police
I could see you finally digging my steelo
I could see us taking over Puerto Rico
or buying stuff in Japan like a truck or a van
with a love in demand worldwide
whether rich, whether poor, weather man, whether more
whether stand, weather storm inside
Hook:
I think it’s time I told ya
Can’t hold these feelings back
A million guys would hold ya
But they don’t got the half
Of all the love I’ll show ya
I’ll give you everything
So tell me what’s the hold up
You wanna be my Queen?
keeping up that sweet and sassy/I really wanna hold your hand
anything you want, just ask me/I’ll get the knockoff if I can
anything you hate, I’ll break it/anything you need, I’ll find
anything you got, I’ll take it/how did you get to be so kind
I could see us living strong, never troublesome ways
I could see us with a dog for a couple of days
Cuz that’s all I’m gonna take, then we’re giving him back
I could see us fighting snakes in a vicious attack
I could see us in a cave or a nautical port
I could see us dancing in our home in New York
I could see us in a little bit of sunset
I could see us saying, “please, we ain’t done yet” - Track Name: Selina
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oh, it was a 187 on a noble heart
I had a little bit of swagger and a hopeful start
see, I saw her face at a birthday soiree
I went late cuz I didn’t plan to stay all day
but she was there, her scent in the air
she was so beautiful it wasn’t even fair
to any other Dixie Chick or SheDaisy
I knew that it was not the time to be lazy
so I walked up with a southwest lean
channeling Black Sheep, I was crispy and clean
I said “I’m Santana, you can call me Jor-din
so what’s your name?” she replied, “Selina”
I just wanted to make her smile
“I got a fresh joke but it takes a while”
and she said, “Dude, it’s okay with me
but you ain’t gon get away with me”
Hook:
Hey, Selina
Is there nothing I can do
Hey, Selina
Just wanna spend time with you
I told the joke but it took too long
shoulda seen that coming, and I kinda came strong
so I tried a different tactic, cool, collected
I wasn’t gon’ be another fool rejected
I was having trouble trying not to lock and freeze
cuz everybody at the party wasn’t feeling my steez
so I made like a maintenance man and got the crap out
but before I left I tried again like a jackmouse
“I got a Camry in the parking lot
it’s got an Arizona tan and it’s probably hot
but it can take us in a minute to a place that’s fresh
I’m so serious, baby, could you just say yes
there’s gotta be a nice park or restaurant
we can drive through the city if it’s what you want
I’ll be the host, pretty woman, you can be my guest
I’m so serious, baby, could you just say yes”
Hook
everywhere I go, it’s the same routine
I try to catch the attention of a dang new thing
but I never understand how to keep it, dude
I’m just hoping one day I can see it through
(Repeat)
Hook - Track Name: You're the Boss
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I’ll never figure out where you get this trash
the more friends you investigate, the less you’ll have
the more men you interrogate, the more you’ll lose
and I ain’t even gotta read the score to prove
but you’re on some female new age liberation tip
you think men are pigs and you’re not taking it
so you’re sitting real smug, like you brought ‘em the truth
but see, your problem isn’t men, girl, the problem is you
it’s true, it’s non fiction/nothing be you fixin’
feeling some control, hey, it’s kind of your addiction
I am not a convict, I don’t need your prison
you can tell me what to do, but I will never listen
is it that you were too spoiled as a baby
maybe it was cute then, now you’re kinda crazy
lady, I ain’t gon’ talk today
I’m just waiting for the moment that you walk away
Hook: you’re the boss, lady
you handle your business like a real Queen B
you’re the boss, lady
but don’t think for a second you gon’ handle me
you fancy yourself as fancy, and super smart
you ain’t tryna be sweet, cuz it’s not who ya are
so you move the bar up, your standards are high
you’re thinking God’s got an impeccable man to comply
but you’re running, guns out, warfare girl-rilla
but you ain’t maneater, you ain’t even mankilla
you’re just a bunch of drama like Billie Jean in some thrilla
I see it in your eyes, you’re a future bride-zilla
if anybody’s stupid enough or calm enough
to make you his wife, always brawling up
I hope he’s ready for the fight of his life, with you trippin
every little word a broken faucet, drippin
gripping white-knuckled to the back of his brain
keep your finger on the trigger case he has to complain
always to ready to remind him all the things that he ain’t
and if he doesn’t go deaf, he’ll prolly just go insane
Hook
see, I don’t think you’re hearing it right
girl I’m not afraid of you, I ain’t fearing the bite
tight, you pull the reins hard/ to get my name scarred
but I don’t care anymore, ain’t that a pain, darling?
you can talk to my friends, my family and neighbors
you can live that life, go on and be a faker
take a plane, or cab, or Lexus
hey, it’s up to you how you make your exit
you’re the boss - Track Name: Won't Date Your Daughter feat. Wolf the Whimsical
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Hook:
No I won’t date your daughter/I’m not really into her
I don’t care to know her father/that sounds like so much work
This whole thing’s a little bit awkward/I’m telling you ma’am, it’s true
No I won’t date your daughter/so you can pretend she’s you
I got a little situation I’m facing
and I just can’t understand what the craze is
but either way, it’s inappropriate chasing
bachelors in the name of your daughter, so you can make him
something like a son in law/I’m running off
cuz arranged arrangements are never that fun at all
hun, and all of this is feeling much too vicarious
it’s perilous, it don’t attract, it embarrasses
I cherish this heart, I’m there if it’s real
but when a mother’s undercover, keeping feeling’s concealed
the deal’s off/and madam, I can be real soft
but if I don’t shoot ya straight, we can get real lost in the meaning
and what I’m meaning, is I’m a young man
sure, I think your daughter’s got a pretty decent sun tan
but I ain’t feeling this, especially not with you
eyeing me from across the room like you do
Hook
whatever you’ve been seeing ain’t really reason enough
for you to practically beg me to come fall in love
with a pretty little thing that’s still living at home
no offense, but that’s intense, I’m happy alone
my phone knows when she’s calling, my email is full
of lots of better things to put my time into, it’s cool
I know you’ve written her a list, maybe I’m at the top
lady, you plant so many seeds, some farmers are losing jobs
crops growing wild, leaves in a pile
your manipulation jungle is cramping my style
and while I really like the notion that a mom would approve
you need to understand, the pedestal I’m on’s gotta move
it’s unhealthy/and whether wealthy or poor
as long as mommy’s acting giddy, I’m evading your door
so don’t expect me/it’s circumstantial is all
cuz if I wanted her I’m sure you wouldn’t want me to call
Hook - Track Name: Shakespeare feat. Ginger Morby
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Ginger:
I dream of a man who loves me so
and lets me know
who I am
with a statuesque face/and an excellent taste
and a grace with developing plans
I dream of a man who takes the time
to seek and find
my needs
with a reasonable mass/of hard-earned cash
and he loves to spend it on me!
-----
listen, I’m the reject of your plan
I don’t got the money you expect from a man
if you need something, I’ll just wreck up demands
you need to take a look at the rest of the land
and find a smarter dude with the best upper hand
stop looking at me, I’m a mess of a man
in a week you’ll think I’m less of a man
I’m not what you want, baby, check what I’m sayin’
I ain’t playing around, I’m not fit for the part
the pedestal is shaky, I hit floors hard
and I’m afraid I should quit ‘fore I start
cuz I don’t really want you to rip up my heart
it’s tart, and it’s bitter, we should not go for it
I’m broke, and my jokes ain’t funny no more
the young Santana just becomes an old bore
I’m just letting you know, girl, my heart’s so torn
-----
Ginger: come to dinner with me
Jordan: no thanks, I’d rather just stay at home
Ginger: come to lunch with me
Jordan: I appreciate the offer, but I want to be alone
Ginger: then come to breakfast with me
Jordan: I’m...not getting anywhere with this conversation
-----
you need to research until them facts is straight
somebody told you wrong for you to act this way
see, I’m not the man you need, I’m the last to place
I got mental complications in a vast array
they say I’m hot as long as you can get past my weight
they say I’m sweet ‘til the moment that I blast away
I don’t know why I be the man that can catch your gaze
when there’s a lot of other options that’ll last for ages
so think of me like some fashion phases
the hype dies down, then it’s back to basics
cuz you and me don’t really wanna clash in cages
you need to understand that you don’t have to face this
the fire turns into some ashy blazes
communication down like we’re fasting phrases
we’ll never learn to stand in such elastic places
so tell me once again, what were you asking, baby? - Track Name: I Don't Need You
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Hook:
I, I got a new friend now, baby
And I don't need you
I, I'm on that new tip now, baby
And I don't need you
I love you like I love a cold and a little bit of fever
I love you like I'm stuck in a blizzard and never heard of a heater
I love you like a city street loves having a riot
I love you like a fat kid loves to be on a diet
girl, I love you like Africans love hearing n-words
I love you like compassionate people love seeing friends hurt
I love you...and it's sort of like I love a lot of pain on a positive weekend
or like I love a little traffic collision upon the start of a journey before the road trip begins
Hook
I love you like diseases
or a lot of old and moldy cheeses
I love you like I love frostbite and my arm freezes
and it's kind of like this dude jumping out of an airplane, and he pulls the chord, but his parachute don't come out
and he's falling to his death...
well, like he would love breezes
I love like I love being told I ain't worthwhile
I love you like all these college kids saying I'm not their style
I love you like I love a nightmare on a lonely evening
I love you like I'm waking up screaming and my throat is bleeding
I love a little competition like, this is who's after you
all these dapper dudes vying for your attention with attitude
I love being a victim, dwelling in the aftermath of you
I love it how you took my heart and flushed it down the crapper tube
Hook
I love you like depression, but I love depression more
you must really take to heart that all is fair in love and war
and I'm through with this
I had something to do with this
but I'm really only embarrassed I ever blew you a kiss
you blew my mind but I never really meant it as optimistic
and there's something kinda twisted and I think I found the difference
the spell is gone...I'm on that new tip, girl
I'm spending lots of time on my music, girl - Track Name: 16 Bars of Honesty
-
hi. I'm Jordan. I like women but I'm scared of them
if I could choose one thing to compare to them
I'd pick a nice sword/I like the look of it all
I like to hold it and display it on a hook on the wall
but when I take it to heart, that's when it hurts so bad
it's a suicidal situation, scantily clad
see a sword is precious/you'll probably wanna tight grip it
but most of all you gotta learn how to fight with it
you might give it a break/you might whip into shape
but all in all you'll learn you can't just swing
it's certainly exciting/it might be a thrill
but it's an ancient craft to handle swords with skill
I must not have what it takes/I think I'm lacking the essentials
I wind up worn out in my physical and mental
I know that it's not really important in the long run
and I don't have a use for a sword, but man, I want one - Track Name: Close to Me
-
I have a dream of you
an image undefined
don’t mean to misconstrue
just tryna speak my mind
this image won’t let go
something about your eyes
the way you let me know
you really want to try
Pre-Hook:
oh, tell me, darling, is it me, is it me
not holding you is misery, baby
oh, tell me, darling, is it me, is it me
not holding you is misery, baby
Hook:
I only want you close to me
It could be so good
Some days it feels like it’s supposed to be
If only you would
Get close to me
I wanna hold your hand
I wanna feel your hair
but all this time, I can’t
determine if you care
Pre-Hook
Hook
she lives so well, and I just want a part of that
she walks in and I almost get a heart attack
she’s sweet like chocolate ice cream
it’s like I’m living in a constant pipe dream
but she’s just…too smart, she gotta know
I ain’t really saying there’s a lot to show
I don’t need a little conversation
I’m too scared of a confirmation
that nothing’s there
so it’s better in a state of wonderin’
although attraction percent is one hundred
I don’t really wanna see it implode
so I guess I’m gon’ leave it alone
but I'll keep dreaming of a different lifetime
when right now could become the right time
but my time never really comes and goes
I'm in the rain and the thunder knows
I still want her close…
Hook - Track Name: Dance Darling
-
I got two left feet but they both have rhythm
wearing Converse cuz I like how they fit ‘em
the beat get ‘em going, the drop make ‘em stop
walk a million miles where the music don’t pop
“hip hop, body rock, and doing the do”
I was hoping for a dance and I’m looking at you
I can’t walk it out, or pop, lock, and drop nothing
no stunna shades so you know I’m not fronting
running out the network, emerge from the thicket
where the chicks always dance in a line like picket
I want something different/a lot better plan
I’m thinking you should kick it with a lot better man
I don’t fit in but I fit the bill
if you got a void, baby, I’m quick to fill
hit the bell, ring the alarm, the party’s on
you and me, girl, we can rock if you want
Hook:
do you wanna dance with me girl?
do you wanna dance with me girl?
do you wanna dance with me girl?
dance, darling, dance
I travel with a battle axe up in my saddlebag
ain’t nothing on your new space Cadillac
check out my catalogue/ain’t selling that at all
I just rap in return for a bad applause
rapping raw ain’t a fad at all
I’m hip hop ‘til I die, leaving dads appalled
at such a waste, but I’m born to fly
can’t keep me on the ground cuz I won’t comply
my, the Free Bird got a wingspan
looking for a goose that can be my wingman
or wing woman, a keen romance
or just a fly bird, that could make a team
so dance a little, darling/I used to hunt like Steve Arwin
or Erwin/now I ride smooth, no swerving
heard it’s a rhythm and I’m tryna see
if a woman like you’d wanna vibe with me
Hook
I can be your dance partner/companero
and I need the music, cuz I’m so unsettled
and I’m supposed to/keep it confident like a boaster
but this ain’t never been a calm rollercoaster
most of this keeps a dude controlled
I’m too worried ‘bout the things that the future holds
so right now/let’s leave it all out on the floor
do me a favor, sing the hook once more
Hook - Track Name: Love Will feat. Francette
-
Love, she is a warrior princess, or better yet a queen
tell me please, have you ever, ever met a thing
so powerful/you can let the power pull
you to destruction or don’t even touch it
much is required of all participants
give it only a week, you’ll sense the significance
the difference from before to the present
Love can burn down the walls of your pride, if you let it
forget it, even if you don’t give it control, it rips at the soul
you’re tryna get a grip of the load
but you don’t understand/it’s the debate of the ages
beautiful and ugly on different faces
dwelling in places hidden from sight
you don’t know what the taste is ‘til you give it a bite
face it, your strength is nothing, run if you can
Lady Love is tracking you with a gun in her hand
Hook:
Love will find a way to you
See the light as the night grows black
Love will find a way to you
Hold tight, hear the thunder crack
Love will find a way, Love will find a way
Love will find a way to you
Love, she will amaze in a maze of boredom
her voice rings out high above the wardrums
if you’re looking for more fun, head for the hills
and watch closely, don’t let her get ahead of your will
Love will complete you and wreck you
respect due to the Queen, she will sting and bless you
confess truth, Love never ceases, there is no thesis
to describe the hearts she reaches
to some the disease is a mighty affliction
to some an addiction/to some, only a matter of fiction
depictions of an angel/sketched from every angel
portraits of hearts possessed and entangled
but to some, Love is a glow and a hum
radiating with force we’ve come to know in the sun
make you throw in the towel, to grow in your spirit
Love will conquer all, we embrace it and fear it
Hook
Love, she is the dominant life form, despite war
as they fight more, she will prevail as the night roars on
Love is more strong than oppression
Love will battle on, singing songs of obsession
lesson learned, Love burns in a rainstorm
all of her captives are purchased and paid for
Love defeated death, and will again
showing restless hearts how to be still again
Hook
